15th January – Sleep Talking

Searching for inspiration for writing my blog, I went in to check on my girls as I had heard an unusual noise.

I arrived to find my youngest, sat up in bed, still asleep and talking. Then it suddenly struck me that sleep talking would be a fantastic topic to cover in this ‘blog a day’ challenge. I settled her and then set about working on this.  

For as long as I can remember, my nights have been filled with vivid dreams. Sometimes, those dreams are paired with sleep talking. On occasions, my dreams are fuelled by anxiety; other times, I believe it could be my mind being incredibly overactive. I do wonder if getting a better night’s sleep might reduce my sleep talking.   

“Daniel – get off my cardigan!” is the first instance of sleep talking I remember. It must have been when I was in year 2 or 3 of primary school. 

I can wake myself crying uncontrollably. 

The worst of all my sleep talking/communicating. This distresses me and I often struggle to fall back to sleep. A good proportion of these dreams centre around the death of a loved one, often my grandparents. I often think it’s strange that I still dream about them as it’s almost been half my life that I’ve lived without a single one being alive. 

I can wake myself laughing hysterically. 

The second worst of my sleep talking/communicating. This isn’t because I feel so low afterwards, rather I’m usually giggling for ages afterwards. Colin strongly dislikes this type too as I end up chortling away to myself so much that I rock the bed and keep him awake. 

I think my all-time favourite examples of dreams which result in this uncontrollable laughter are: 

“A sheep trumped on my head” 

This was me attempting to justify why I was crying with laughter. Anyone ever had a strange dream like that? 

“A squirrel just gave birth on my foot!” 

What had I been eating that day? Again, justifying my giggling (this is the most pathetic choice of synonym for laughter I could have chosen as really, I was roaring!), this is what I announced had occurred in my dream. Very random indeed. 

The most common type of sleep talking is usually just mundane. It can be me telling the children what to do, explaining a method in maths to a pupil or just really incoherent waffling. 

A few years ago, I decided to record my nocturnal utterings using a sleep recorder app. It kicks in when it hears noise. What a fascinating experience! Until one morning… I decided to see what it had recorded. Rather than the usual inane murmuring, there was a very quiet whisper of a voice saying “Excuse me please.” This was not my voice. There was no one else whose voice it could be. 

Who was the mysterious speaker? Absolutely no idea. It gave me the creeps though. In fact, it freaked me out so much that I decided to use it as inspiration for Year 6 creative writing. The genre was spooky stories and so I played them the sleep recorder clip and explained the background. They all agree there was no way the voice was mine. The stories they came up with, each containing the words “Excuse me please” were incredible. So, while this remains a mystery and something that is rather creepy, it also provides a fantastic stimulus for creative writing. 

Update: I recently downloaded another sleep recorder app in a bid to capture more funny moments. My quality of sleep hasn’t really changed and unfortunately, nothing of note to report aside from me telling someone I was worth it!

I’d love to know about your sleep talking. What’s the funniest or strangest thing you’ve ever said?